TURNING UP THE HEAT IN THE BEDROOM
“Intercourse, although that may be the end game, is not actually the most intimate thing”.
I have been married for 10 years, and as we all know, I am an extrovert and enjoy being the center of attention.
This also reflects in my sex life and has from the very beginning. I am the more adventurous and open one in the bedroom and my husband is a bit more of an extrovert. While this is fine, sometimes it takes Some compromising
on both ends to give each other what they “really” wants. Without having to ask to turn up the heat in the
bedroom, here are a few things you can “just do” to get you there.
Turn the lights low and light some candles. For an added advantage, use a scented candle, or even
a body massage candle that can be used as both a candle and a body massage oil.
Start with a warm bath. Instead of just jumping in to sex, start with something that relaxes you and helps you
feel intimate. After all, why are we scared to be adventurous in bed? Because it feels like all we care about is sex. Doing something that connects you more intimately and shows you that it is about the relationship. So take
a warm bath or a hot shower. Get relaxed and let yourselves feel the attraction.
Pick a special night. Pick a certain night of the week that no matter what happens, it will be about the both of you.
If you don’t make even one day a week a propriety, you will be surprised at how much time goes by in between intimate moments.
Try something totally new. Try some that you would never normally do. If you need some ideas, read a book,
ask a friend, or watch some porn! I am certain this will stir up a few good ideas.
Get creative with a homemade “fantasy jar”. Write your ideas on pieces of paper and then put them in a jar.
You must do what you partner writes on that piece of paper and vice versa. Do it with some passion,
even if it is something you really do not want to do. Take one for the team on this one!
Intercourse, although that may be the end game, is not actually the most intimate thing. It’s far more intimate
to be intentional about touching and teasing and taking time to explore. That shows real interest on your part
and in your partner, so learning about them and what they want means more than the actual act.
Once you focus on this, the heat in the bedroom will turn itself up.