Beer Belly Or Wealthy??
If we look back in history there was a point in time where the larger the belly you had the wealthier you were. Meaning that you had money to spend and eat and drink well. Indulge in the better things in life. Now I’m not sure the same standards apply. Most bellies can be contributed to the mad consumption of beer, beer and more beer!
Ahh the lovely jiggle of Budweiser can also mean wealth as well depending on your view of things. I mean, nobody can take it away from you and lord knows it’s all paid for. So guys for the sake of Octoberfest, get out there and BELLY UP!!! Lets stand proud and push them suckers out and show the world how wealthy we are.
Personally I would like to lose just enough weight so my boobs stop shaking when I brush my teeth!!
(Please Belly Responsibly)
Belly-Flop Rules & Regs Of The WBCDC
The World Belly-Flop Cannonball Diving Championship League contests are not to be taken LIGHTLY (no pun).
There are 3 rules to be able to enter:
1. Weigh at the appropriate weight
2. Be blessed with an appealing smile
3. Come equipped with a colorful swimsuit
Scoring consists of all competitors will perform three dives each from a one-meter springboard, of the belly-flop and tightly-tucked cannonball, and will be scored on the established world-class standards:
1. Estimated height of splash
2. Estimated weight of water displaced
3. Degree of difficulty
5. Personality (e.g. smiling/screaming a lot)
6. Color choice of bathing-suit
There are no prizes for second place, first place gets:
1. The coveted Green Bathrobe, emblematic of Master’s status in belly-flop and cannonball diving.
2. The 31/2 foot World Championship trophy in simulated gold plate worth no more than $80.
3. A personalized bowling bag with the winner’s initials.
4. A set of matched wrenches.
5. A bag stuffed with CASH (not)!
(Please Flop Yourself Responsibly)
TOP 5 DEADLIEST WARRIORS?
(1 being the deadliest)
Gurkha: Originally from Nepal, these reckless warriors caught the eye of the British Empire during the East India Company’s invasion of Nepal in 1814. Their skills are so mastered they have even fought for the US in both world wars.
Delta Force: Similar to SEAL Team 6, there is not a whole lot of information concerning Delta Force available to the public. Their operations are generally considered high profile and extremely classified.
Navy SEAL: America’s amphibious special force, the Navy Seals are so good at unconventional warfare that it doesn’t even matter what they’re holding – it’s a weapon. Trained for one purpose, to neutralize the enemy, they have been known to operate outside of international law and military protocol.
Ninja: These covert agents of feudal Japan specialized in unorthodox arts of war. Often the “whatever it takes” mentality of these warriors is contrasted against the Samurai who upheld a strict code of honor and combat.
Green Beret: A member of the US Army Special Forces, Green Berets are specialists in unconventional warfare. As dangerous as they are on the battlefield though they are also required to be highly intelligent. Due to the nature of their job assignments they must be fluent in an assigned foreign language which they will learn over the span of a few months while in training.
THE LARGEST VAGINA
So as I sit around and think of what would interest people and what inspires people to make a name for themselves….what a better way to show spirit and confidence by putting yourself out there (no pun) to show off that you have the largest vagina in history. I mean I have to admit I was a bit curious myself on this one. So drum roll please………The world’s biggest vagina belonged to Anna Swan (1846-1888) and it’s circumference measured 19ins (48cm). That’s just a wee smaller than a rugby ball!! Who wakes up in the morning and says I wonder if I can make history by getting my vagina measured?
God bless that women and the things she’s accomplished.
(Please Vagina Responsibly)
It’s a given… That just because you act like a character, doesn’t mean you have character!
By Otto D.